Spokane Friends Meeting

Thank you for inviting me.  You are all part of my home/family/mother — responsible for who I am. Hear that as “thanks” rather than “blame.” Lots of Quakers round the world…may wish you would have done a better job…but I am a far better person than would have been without you.

As noted, today is World Quaker Day—and I thought I would focus on “What in the World are Friends Doing?” Depending on how one asks the question— it can evoke different responses. May get a little of both from me today, especially now that I am no longer working for a Quaker organization—I’ve have a new found freedom to be critical! 🙂

In all honesty, a much easier question to focus on would be “What aren’t we doing?”…because we do a lot for being such a small group: SLIDE 2  (Slides to be added ASAP)

*Education, outreach, communion, service, political lobbying, etc

*Local church like SF—one of 1000s around world contextualizing faith—                              proclaim/demonstrate Good News of Living Christ who speaks to our condition

*Important work—life changing…

*Laboratory where Christ is known, love one another, nurtured in ministry

*My own experience…prepared to help someone like me?

*Come back to this one in a few minutes

Lots of other smaller projects making a huge difference in their context…too many to tell about.  I will highlight a few…ones I know well.

SLIDES

• In the 30 days of violence following the general election in 2007 more than 1,220 people were killed, 3,500 injured and 350,000 displaced, as well as hundreds of rapes and the destruction of over 100,000 properties.

Church/meeting

• Great laboratory…place we contextualize gospel
• Most important work happens here—front-line of work…if not authentic here…rest won’t matter
• We don’t proseletyze…really? Early Quakers did
  • Valiant 70…great spread
  • Growth in Africa/S. America…”successful mission movement”…holistic
  • Why? SIZE?…believed had a transforming message…an exciting life/work wanted others to know, experience for selves, join into
  • Most important…part of what God doing through the Living Christ—reconciling all of creation to God’s self—reformation/restoration of the Cosmos…something no political party can achieve
• Not “proselutos”…change religious affiliation
  • No—message of Jesus—Metanoia—life overhaul—turn from sin/self to God and goodness
• Quakers—this convincement—not believe in testimonies/doctrine/forms…
  • LIFE & POWER!
  • Lamb’s War—overcome self, community, even into society
  • Why dared to call others…God and Gospel Order

Fear for us…growing divisions, myopia

• Young people—meeting “has no practical impact on our lives…”
• Lose possibility to join in renewal and participate in shape and direction
• Fear we lose this—series of religious events, philosophy…Life and a Power…

I have emphasized Global Connection—I think it is key for us…

• In the US we are so individualistic—“spend so much time talking about ME, so little time about we”
• What is our identity? What are we inviting people into? Laugh about…but may be our undoing
• Celebrate diversity…but we need to also find that unity that transcends (not eradicates) our diversity
• I believe experience of living Christ
• George Fox quote in turbulent time—“Mind that which is eternal which gathers your hearts together up to the Lord and lets you see that you are written in one another’s hearts… “

This message was delivered by Colin Saxton at Spokane Friends Church on October 7, 2018.

The thoughts I am sharing this morning are based on ideas from the Pacific Northwest Quaker Women’s Theology Conference.  That word “theology” sounds a bit scary, but the type of theology referred to is narrative theology, that is, theology based on story-telling.  Sort of like when we tell each other about our “faith journey” or when we try to interpret why particular events in our life are so memorable (which is very appropriate for Quakerism, which claims to be an experiential religion). The theme of the Conference was “Answering that of God in every one.”

The Dalai Lama has said “Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them humanity cannot survive.”  We have all heard the idea that when Jesus said we must love others as ourselves, the assumption is that to do this, we must love ourselves.

In fact it has been said that the quality of love with which you love yourself is the quality of love you can give to others.  In a similar way, to answer “that of God” in another person, we must find “that of God” in ourselves.

As I started thinking about this, I realized that I assumed that we all are agreed on what the phrase means  “that of God in everyone” and that we all believe that it is a true statement – that there really is “that of God in everyone.”   Maybe we don’t all agree, so I will say what I think it means.

The Greeks had a notion of final purpose:  that all life strives to become what it was meant to be.  Aristotle said that the true nature of any being is what it can become.  The acorn is meant to become an oak tree, and it will continue to grow toward that final purpose.  So, too, with human beings – within each of us, there is a potential to become more than we are – and for most of us, there is also a drive to fulfill that potential, and to become more fully ourselves.  I truly believe that Jonas wants to become the best Jonas possible, Pam wants to became the Pam that God wants her to be – totally unique and very different from the fully realized Lorna or Linda or Bob or Wade.   Jesus said, “Be ye perfect, as your Father in heaven is perfect.”  The word translated as “perfect” actually means ”complete”.  Christ, we believe, is the complete expression of what a human being with the spiritual potential fully developed looks like.  When the full nature of human possibility is revealed in a completely fulfilled life, we see the life and love and character of God.  One of the earliest witnesses of his life declared that “God is Love” and that Love originates from God.   If we saw him (p.68)

As humans we have some abilities that other species do not seem to have. We have the ability to organize our experiences according to space and time, that is to say, location and succession.  This event happened at that place, and it happened before that other event that happened at the same place or at a different place.  We also have the ability to imagine a situation different than the one we are in, we can think of ways it could be better.  There is something within us that wants to go deeper, to move toward an ideal, and to improve our lives and our societies.  And we have a sense of right and wrong, what we call a conscience – we have a moral sense that the choices we make can lead us closer to good things, true things, beautiful things, that we can move toward our ideals.

Scientists has told us that we cannot have a hunger for something that we have never tasted.  Say that you travel to another country and see a fruit you have never seen before.  You cannot feel hungry for it.  When we hunger for a particular food, that food exists and we know that because we have tasted it.  Or even more basically, when we are hungry, there is that which will satisfy that hunger.  When we want sex, or in its highest form, love, there is another person, usually (but not always) of a different gender than ourselves, who can satisfy that need.  In the same way, people of all ages have longed for something beyond themselves, something more, something greater, something Beyond, something Other, something Eternal.  And in all ages, people have felt this beyond within themselves, some correspondence with eternal reality.  For this hunger also, there is a relationship with God that will satisfy this longing.

Phillips Brooks was a great American preacher and the author of O Little Town of Bethlehem.  One of his favorite texts was The spirit of man is the candle of the Lord  (Proverbs 20:27), a beautiful verse buried in the book of Proverbs .  It means that there is something in a person’s inmost being that can be kindled and struck into flame by God, and as we feed the flame within our lives, we can become revealing places for God, a flame of God’s life, not something added on to fix up a poor excuse for a human being or to redeem something worthless.  It is a capacity which belongs to our beings as human.  The process of salvation is thus not away from normality, it is, rather the attainment of complete normal spiritual health.  As Phillips Brooks used to declare, it IS health.   The cool, calm vigor of the normal human life; the making of a person to be herself; the calling up out of the depth of her being and the filling with vitality of that self which is truly her – THAT is salvation.”  Once he gave a vivid description of the birth of a waterspout at sea.  Far away in the distance the sailor sees a dark cloud hover over the sea.  Suddenly the cloud and sea join in one indivisible whirling movement and together sweep irresistibly onward.  It is impossible to separate cloud and sea or to say where cloud ends and sea begins.  It is so with divinity and humanity, the above and the below.  Or it is like the meeting-place of the river and the ocean.  The river runs far out into the ocean and again, the tides of the ocean flood back into the river and no fixed line of division can be drawn.

So, we as Quakers believe that we can experience this connection between God and ourselves   If this connection is built into us, is at the core of our humanity, then it is in fact true that there is that of God within every human being, they are equally God’s creation, God’s beloved children with whom he is trying to establish a relationship.  And it is true of ourselves as well.

If we grew up in a fairly normal family environment, it is not all that difficult to cultivate a sense of compassion for others – beginning with those we love, then gradually moving on to those we like, continuing to those we don’t know, and finally widening our compassionate circle (if we are working hard on it) to encompass those we actively dislike. It takes some practice, but it’s relatively easy to be compassionate to others.

But it is harder to be compassionate to ourselves.  How do we learn to love ourselves?  Why is it hard?  Perhaps because everybody has something about themselves that they don’t like; something that causes them to feel shame, to feel insecure, or not “good enough.” It is the human condition to be imperfect, and feelings of failure and inadequacy are part of the experience of living a human life.  You each have a half sheet of paper in your bulletin, and I hope you have something to write with – we tried to check that when you came in.  I’d like you to take out that paper and write down what situations blind you to seeing the Light in yourself?  What imperfections make you feel inadequate – everyone has at least a few things they don’t like about themselves or makes them feel “not good enough.”  Now this is entirely private, no one is going to see this but you.  So just jot down things you feel insecure about – could be physical appearance, work issues, relationship issues, how you spend your time .. just take a couple minutes to do that.

(Give a couple minutes)

Notice how you feel when you think about these things.  Examine the emotions that come up, and let yourself experience them. We are so often desperate to avoid feeling anything negative, but negative feelings are an inherent part of life.  Just sit with them for a minute.  Just feel the emotions that thinking about your imperfections dredges up.

(a minute more)

Now I’d like you to write down what would a kind friend say or do to support you if they knew how you were feeling right now?  This is a friend who knows you very well and is kind.  How would that kind friend try to comfort you?  What would that friend say your good points are?  List them on the other side of the page.  These are the qualities that God sees in you, that God is encouraging you to develop and integrate into your view of yourself.  Just as a good parent sees what her child could grow up to be, so God sees our potential and is trying to help us grow into our true selves.

And maybe we can look at others in this way also, especially those whose candle is not shining very brightly and whose light seems obscured.  We can wonder what God sees as their good points.  If we cannot see that flame within them, we might ask What do they love?  What are they trying to do?  What is the unmet need that is causing the behavior which upsets me so much?  What does God see in this person that I cannot see?

And when we as Quakers sit in silence and try to center down, we bring our whole selves into the light of God’s spirit, warts and all, we acknowledge our failures, but we do not stop there.  We wait for God to say, “Yes, I know those things.  But now we can set them aside.  Now we can turn our attention to helping you become the person that I created you to be, a complete healthy person that I can rejoice in and whose life will abound in such actions and joyfulness that others will see you and be drawn to me.”

f a person to be hers

Now I’d like you to write down what would a kind friend say or do to support you if they knew how you were feeling right now?  This is a friend who knows you very well and is kind.  How would that kind friend try to comfort you?  What would that friend say your good points are?  List them on the other side of the page.  These are the qualities that God sees in you, that God is encouraging you to develop and integrate into your view of yourself.  Just as a good parent sees what her child could grow up to be, so God sees our potential and is trying to help us grow into our true selves.

And maybe we can look at others in this way also, especially those whose candle is not shining very brightly and whose light seems obscured.  We can wonder what God sees as their good points.  If we cannot see that flame within them, we might ask What do they love?  What are they trying to do?  What is the unmet need that is causing the behavior which upsets me so much?  What does God see in this person that I cannot see?

And when we as Quakers sit in silence and try to center down, we bring our whole selves into the light of God’s spirit, warts and all, we acknowledge our failures, but we do not stop there.  We wait for God to say, “Yes, I know those things.  But now we can set them aside.  Now we can turn our attention to helping you become the person that I created you to be, a complete healthy person that I can rejoice in and whose life will abound in such actions and joyfulness that others will see you and be drawn to me.”

Some years ago I began thinking about the language we use when we talk about cancer, when I read an article that questioned whether a church with a peace testimony should use militaristic language when speaking about cancer.  Sort of like suddenly becoming aware that songs like “Onward Christian soldiers” or “Am I a Soldier of the Cross”  might not be the best songs for a Quaker worship service.  On the other hand, the Bible uses military metaphors – Paul talks about “putting on the whole armor of God” or says “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the course”.  Oh look, two metaphors in the same sentence, one about fighting, another about running a race.

But sometimes we don’t realize how our language shapes our thinking.

Let me start by saying that I do not now have cancer nor have I ever had that diagnosis, but I did lose a brother to cancer, also a sister-in-law, and two cousins whom I grew up with.  And I know that most of us have this kind of “second-hand” experience with the disease — and some of us in the room today are cancer survivors or are dealing with a cancer diagnosis as we speak.  Secondly, I do not have an answer to the question of what is the right way to talk about such an experience; we are each individuals and might have very different ideas about which metaphors are useful and which are not, in any given situation.

Metaphors permeate our daily language, and we are often unaware of the use or the power of metaphor.  How many times have you heard the phrase “time is money”?  Or “life is just a bowl of cherries” ?  Aristotle described metaphor as “giving something a name that belongs to something else”.  Metaphor is a figure of speech in which a word or phrase literally denoting one kind of object or idea is used in place of another to suggest a likeness or analogy between them.”  Some people “sail through life” while others “carry a heavy load.”  Metaphors reframe complex issues and help to provide meaning.”  We are told in the Old Testament to “put on the garment of praise”.  Jesus said “You must be born again“ and “I am the Bread of Life”.

In our culture the military metaphor has dominated the way we think, and talk, about cancer.  I am asking us to think about whether there might be other metaphors that would be more useful to us.

Even the pacifist and the gentlest of patients think about fighting when they are faced with cancer.  It is almost instinctive.  Our medical language is full of violence metaphors.  Think about the language of immunology for example:  lymphocytes are “deployed” or “mobilized”, we talk about “killer cells”; the images are all about “battles” of supremacy and survival.  We hear about a new “magic bullet”.

One author suggested that this is true because medicine has grown out of a science dominated by men and masculine patterns of thought.  In this environment, emotional restraint and the pursuit of power are rewarded.  The “medicine is war” metaphor has serious implications because it gives a picture of the patient as passive and the physician as active and in control.  So the physician and the disease are the focal point of the battle, not the patient.  The patient often feels “disempowered” because they aren’t given the “right” weapon to fight or that the doctors are “the generals” and they’re just common “foot soldiers”.

The military metaphor was also applied to nursing practices in the late 18^th century.  The nursing profession was characterized by loyalty and obedience, the two key qualities that soldiers were expected to demonstrate.  Nursing was organized in a structured and military manner.  Nurses took “orders”, worked at “stations”.  As nurses progressed up the “ranks”, “stripes” were added to their caps and “insignia pins” to their “uniforms”.  Sometimes their “orders” even called for them to give “shots”.

Certainly most cancer patients and survivors have indeed BATTLED the disease.  They have struggled in many cases against long odds.  We have been told how hard it is to deal with a cancer diagnosis and to endure even “mild” cancer treatments. It exhausts the body and plays havoc with relationships and families and just about everything else important to us all.  We would never say that people facing cancer are not brave and courageous and in a real “battle”.

The chief criticism of the military metaphor is that in battles there are winners and losers.  The idea of losing the battle seems to imply that if they had just done SOMETHING else differently, then maybe they might have “won”.  The possibility of losing the battle might be that you didn’t fight hard enough.  It’s your fault that you didn’t do better.  The Christian version of this is “You will be healed if you just have faith in God.”  The obvious corollary is that is you don’t get healed, your faith must not be strong enough.  I watched this happen with Jess Salazar, the husband of Juanita Salazar whom some of you knew, when we were in a small group together.  His family thought of this kind of talk as encouragement to him; in fact, it gave him another heavy burden to bear:  In addition to having cancer, he didn’t have enough faith to be healed.  I think that would be devastating rather than encouraging.

It is also disempowering when the person doesn’t want to fight.  This can also lead to people, specifically at the end of life, who feel that they’re losing “and it’s  their fault.

I think warrior metaphors might prevent a person with cancer from being honest with friends and family.  And the result can be loneliness and isolation.

We should not give cancer this kind of power over us.   What other diseases or condition do we give this kind of power?  My father died of a cerebral aneurism.  Did anyone say that he had “lost his battle to a damaged blood vessel”?  No, he died from an aneurism in his brain.  If someone suffers lifelong hypertension, and eventually dies of a heart attack or stroke, do we ever say that he or she lost his or her battle with high blood pressure?

So why do so many deaths from cancer get reported as “after a long struggle/battle, so-and-so lost his/her battle with cancer?

Kate Granger, a doctor with advanced cancer, warned that she would come back to curse anyone who described her as having “lost her brave fight.”  She wrote:

 I do not want to feel a failure about something beyond my control. I refuse to believe my death will be because I didn’t battle hard enough…After all, cancer has arisen from within my own body, from my own cells.  To fight it would be “waging a war” on myself.”

We all die at some point, life eventually kills us.  Yet, few people are reported to have lost their fight with life. 

The second most common metaphor after “fighting a battle” is the “journey” metaphor.  Life is a journey; marriage is a journey, pregnancy is a journey, parenting is a journey, following Christ is a journey, having cancer is a journey.  The road may be long and hard. It may have bumps in it.   We have companions as we travel this road.  There is a sense of purpose in planning one’s journey one step at a time. The journey metaphor can be empowering if it is used to express a sense of acceptance, purpose and control, or when it is used to suggest companionship and solidarity with family and friends and caregivers, of being “all in it together.”  Journey metaphors do not position the disease as an opponent, and therefore they may appear to cause no harm.

However, things are not quite so simple.  For some patients, the journey is less like an epic adventure and more like the trip from hell.  They feel helplessness and frustration, particularly in the face of “navigating” a journey that they hadn’t chosen to embark on.  They feel like “passengers” on a journey they could not control.  One person says it’s like trying to go uphill in a coach without its back wheels”

But do we have to choose between a journey and a fight?  Each person might find that one metaphor works better than another.  Creative people may be able to come up with their own unique metaphor, but what about those of us who are less creative.  What is needed is a “menu of metaphors” which can be shared with people, and people can pick the ones they want, like you do at a restaurant.

Here are a few others that can be mentioned:  A roller coaster image is a way of conveying good moments and bad moments, highs and lows.  Just when you think you’re in a good place, the bottom drops out and your stomach goes with it.

There is the idea of being on a carousel that you can’t get off of, being dizzy and off-balance and hanging on for dear life.

One pediatric oncologist tends to use the language of “work”.  This is going to be “work”, and it’s going to be hard work.  This is somehow less frightening to children than fighting a battle.  And it is phrased as a joint plan “We are going to do this.” It recognizes the role that the child will play. Sports metaphors are sometimes used, such as “game plan”.

Maybe people use metaphors as a way of avoiding having to talk about the reality of cancer.  It’s getting on with life, because life doesn’t stop even for cancer.  It’s having to still get the shopping done, dinner on the table and children off to school even though you’re in pain and frightened by what the future holds.  Maybe if we talked straight about cancer and what it does to people and their loved ones, we wouldn’t need metaphors.

In closing for people like me who run away from military or violent images, it would do well to remember that the word “fight” has many meanings, not just the military one.  Anatomically speaking, people quite naturally “fight” in their own way, and there are parts of the human anatomy whose job it is to fight illness and infection without us even realizing they are doing it.  So whether we like it or not, our bodies are fighting illnesses and we cannot stop them doing it.  It’s natural.

One of the dictionary meanings of “fight is “to struggle to overcome, eliminate or prevent: to strive to achieve or do something.:  What that means is that some people will use the word fight to describe the ability to get out of bed in the morning, to walk to the local shops, to go to a restaurant for a meal.  Fighting to see a doctor who understands their cancer, fighting for access to the best treatment, fighting when you think someone isn’t listening,

As Christians we have a range of religious images that can help us.  One that would be meaningful to me is to imagine I am resting in God’s hands (sort of like that old All-State commercial) or that I am surrounded by a cloud of God’s love.  Or that Christ is in my boat on a very rough sea.  I’m going to sit down now, and maybe, some of you will want to share metaphors or images that have been helpful to you during bad times.

This message was given by Lois Kieffaber at Spokane Friends Church on July 1, 2018.

Welcome to part III of a series on Spirituality of Eric Clapton’s music.  During part I of this sermon series we established Eric Clapton as a Rock and Roll bad boy blessed with the ability to not only play guitar but to write lyrics true to his experience, an honest look at a sometimes-dishonorable life.  We listened to two rock and roll classics, Cocaine and Layla.  The first about the power, allure and harm of drug use and abuse, second Layla, written out of his obsession with Patty Boyd, the wife of this close friend, George Harrison.

In part II we listened as Eric hit rock bottom.  His marriage to Patty Boyd was ending.  His career was in tatters.   A close friend had just committed suicide and he realized that he needed help to survive in the world without alcohol.  In the song, Holy Mother, we heard Eric  call to the maternal side of God asking for a hand to hold and arms to comfort him as he attempted to find his way of the situation he had created through his addiction.

In this sermon we will hear Eric desire and appreciate divine guidance from the paternal side of God in a song entitled “My Father’s Eyes”, but first some confessions on being a parent and some background on Eric.

Children are attuned to their own feelings and perspectives on the world and struggle at times to understand the larger picture.  While I loved my parents dearly, I could easily see the mistakes they were making as parents and believed that I could and would do a much better job in parenting my own kids.  In fact, I would be the perfect father to my children.  I am glad they are here today so they can attest to my having achieved perfection as a father.   (wait for uncomfortable laugh)  What, not perfect?

Yes, parenting seemed easy to me until I became one — even though most of the time I was simply an observer to a growing individual.  There were many times that I did not know what to do.  Often in those times a funny thing occurred.   I began repeating the words and actions of my parents, the same words and actions that I hated as a child.

Mark Twain talked about his father in this way

“When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.”― Mark Twain

Twain’s tongue-in-cheek way of saying that he recognized the wisdom of his father as he grew older accurately describes many situations I experienced in my transition to fatherhood.   I saw the wisdom in actions that previously did not make any sense.   Additionally, there were times when I mindlessly did what my father did, even though I had little expectation of success.  No, not because I saw the wisdom, but because I didn’t know what else to do.  I simply followed what was modeled for me.   This is how family culture, including dysfunctionality, is passed from generation to generation.

In parenting, much of what we do are actions that have been modeled for us.   As a male I tend to look more to my father a role model and I believe that this is typical of men.

What would we do if parental modeling never took place?  Who would we turn to if we didn’t experience a father?  How would we act?  How would we know what to do as a parent? When we don’t know what to do?  We will return to this question later.

But now some back ground on Eric Clapton.

As Eric’s marriage with Patty Boyd was breaking up, he began dating Italian-born actress and model Lory Del Santo.  According to an article based on an interview with Lory, she and Eric agreed to have a child together.  Once she was pregnant, Eric’s insecurities and moodiness made their relationship very difficult for Lory.  She reports that “It took six months for Clapton to adjust to the idea of becoming a father. It was very difficult to speak to him.”  He was absent for much of the pregnancy, and at one point according Lory,  Eric’s manager wanted her to end the pregnancy.  She refused, saying,

“We took a decision together and that’s the way it is. . . I can disappear but there is no way in the world you can make me give up the baby.”

Lory’s insistence on keeping the child helped Eric come to terms with his alcoholism.   Conor Clapton was born on August 21^st, 1986, in Paddington, England.

The arrival was sobering for Eric.  In his autobiography he writes

“It had begun to sink in that I was a father and it was time to grow up”  . . .  but the question was, How?. . . I had no idea how to begin with him; I was a baby looking after a baby.”

One critical aspect of Eric’s transaction into fatherhood was sobriety.  He explained to Ed Bradley in a 60 Minutes interview this way:

When he was born I was drinking, and he was really the chief reason that I went back to treatment, because I really did love this boy.  I know he is like a little baby, but he can see me and he can see what I am doing.

The song My Father’s Eyes captures  Eric’s earnest desire to do right by Conor and his need for divine guidance as he raises his son.

Time references contained in the lyrics can be confusing.  The verses of the song are written in present tense, while the chorus references are past and future tense.  It seems that Eric is remembering vivid experiences with his son that are dated. Reflecting on those vivid experiences and summing up what he has come to understand.    Conor should have been 12 when the song was released in 1998 .   It contains 3 verses.  Look at your handout for a copy of the lyrics.  The first verse describes him waiting for his son, and the effect his son has on his spirit.

Sailing down behind the sun,
Waiting for my prince to come.
Praying for the healing rain
To restore my soul again.

Just a toe rag on the run.
How did I get here?
What have I done?

The last 4 lines of the verse talk about his son being a blonde and very active “toe rag on the run,” and then his  amazement of being a father and his hopes for the future.  In an interview Eric talks about how much he loved his son and how he had become the central focus of his life.

In the next verse he expresses his joy of being with his son and his apprehension of what to do, how to interact how to raise this child.

Then the light begins to shine
And I hear those ancient lullabies.
And as I watch this seedling grow,
Feel my heart start to overflow.

Where do I find the words to say?
How do I teach him?
What do we play?

Eric doesn’t know how to interact with his son Conor at a pretty basic level.  He, according to Patty Boyd’s biography, has always been the child, a rock legend with people always looking after his needs while he simply does what he wants. Now things are different if he wants to properly raise his son.  The next verse mentions the dark side of Eric’s life.  He continues to struggle with alcoholism. He is sober in front of his son, but as soon as his son goes to bed at night, he drinks himself into a stupor.  It could be that these first four lines may be speaking to that part of his life.

Then the jagged edge appears
Through the distant clouds of tears.
I´m like a bridge that was washed away;
My foundations were made of clay.

The last 3 lines seem disconnected:   Is loss a failure to connect with his young son, and is the dying soul in the 3^rd line his disappointment over his inability to connect with this child he deeply loves.

As my soul slides down to die.
How could I lose him?
What did I try?

Or it could be that the first 4 lines are tied to the last two.  Remember when I said Conor should have been 12 when the song was released?  He died in a tragic accident in March of 1991.   So is this loss a reference to his death and the jagged edge a constant reminder of the event, which invades these happy remembrances.  It is not clear from the song or the books I have read.  But the contrast between the joy of his interaction with his son in the fist 2 verses and the dark despair of the 3^rd verse is clear.

His need for guidance is mentioned in the last 3 lines of the 2^nd verse but is really the focus of the chorus.  I am not an expert in music, so this structure it might be common than I realize.  The choruses also change over the length of the song.  In the first chorus he asks a question.

How will I know him?
When I look in my father´s eyes.

How will he know his father?  What is he talking about?  You may remember that Eric never met his biological father, so he has never seen him and probably would not recognize him if he did.  Note that this is written in future tense, how will I know him? And “when I look”, rather than “when I looked.”

In the second chorus he moves to past tense in his recognition of when he needs his father’s eyes.  Here is a contrast in time that I spoke about earlier.  The verses are written in present tense, while “realized” is past tense, so he is reflecting on earlier experiences and has realized something.  He realizes that he needs a guide for how to interact with his son and he does not have one.

Eric never had the modeling to fall back on as a parent. His father’s eyes represent his father’s perspective He wants his father’s perspective on the world to guide him in the relationship because he does not know what to do.

Remember the second verse “How do I teach him, what do we play?” But why would he want the perspective of a man he never met? How could this serve as a guide for interactions with his son?

Bit by bit, I´ve realized
That he was here with me;
I looked into my father´s eyes.

It is in the third chorus where I believe the mystery is revealed.  The verse mentions his death (“As my soul slides down to die”) and this chorus talks about his father being with him and how he  “looked into his father’s eyes”.   How could he look into the eyes of a man he never met?  He isn’t speaking of his biological father.  The perspective he sought and received was God’s perspective.

Bit by bit, I´ve realized
That he was here with me;
I looked into my father´s eyes.

To summarize

• He cares deeply for his son.
• He doesn’t have a model of a relationship with his father to fall back on
• He is asking for God to show him how to interact with his son
• And in the process of reflecting on the situation, perhaps long after the death of his son, he realized that God was with him the entire time.

Thus far in this sermon series I have played original recordings of songs from the album on which they were released.  Today I want to play a live version so you can experience some of the musical genius of Eric Clapton.  His band mates once explained that Eric’s solo’s performances on tour are never planned, never rehearsed, they simply flow out of Eric; in fact he says that if he tried to practice and do it from memory, he couldn’t do it.  So the band and his audience never really know what is coming when he plays. Listen to the opening of the song a short solo between verses, and then the long closing solo and realize that he has never played it like that before.  He simply starts and plays what he feels.

Roll “My Father’s Eyes

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bocDpFVhyDw

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I don’t know about you but I have so enjoyed the different voices we have heard from this pulpit in the last few months. I love hearing how the spirit speaks to us so differently yet really quite the same.

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Today I am asking us as we prepare to welcome Christ into our hearts and minds for Christmas to think about Christ being like us in every way, knowing what it is to be tempted, to be downtrodden, to struggle, to experience joy, and to live a life in full dependence upon the Holy Spirit and his relationship with God the Father. To followers of Christ, Jesus is our hero, the person that we look to for our salvation, our hope and our future. Jesus is everything that we hope to be and if there is anyone that we count on to save the day it is Him. Yet even though Christ is our hero, I also believe that we can live exactly as Christ did while he was on earth. Jesus is our hero, but he is a hero whose life we can actually follow. Jesus is not simply a hero who we depend upon to save us, but he is also a hero who says to us “come and follow me, do as I do” and even at one point says to us “greater things will you do than these.” It is this Jesus that I want us to encounter this morning.

We live in a time of Heroes:

I find myself continually thankful that I live in the time that I do. I am a product of the culture of my time. I remember when the internet first became popular, but as an adult I have never known a time without it. I remember when cell phones first came on the scene, but I also consider myself fortunate that my entire adult life I have had a cell phone. However one of the aspects of our current culture that I am personally most thankful for is that in our time it is totally acceptable to be an adult who loves superheroes. Gone are the days when superheroes were only for kids, or geeks, now it is cool to wear a batman t-shirt to work. Why am I so thankful for this? Well if you have ever been by my office you will understand what I’m talking about. I have assembled within it a small collection of superhero memorabilia. I have a plastic cup devoted to each member of the Avengers, I have several flash figurines. My Screen saver on my computer is one of the X-Men. This morning I am wearing my flash T-Shirt and Batman boxers. Yesterday I spent time watching a series of cartoons based upon the Avengers movie. In fact so much is my fascination with superheroes that as an elementary school kid I invented my own superhero. As a kid I had many nicknames that centered around my last name “Maroni.” It’s amazing how many things rhyme with Maroni. By far the most popular choice was also the most obvious, macaroni. In fact to this day students in my mom’s 2nd Grade class will call her Mrs. Macaroni. So as a fourth grader who desired to grow up to be a cartoonist, I invented my own superhero “Macaroni Man” and his arch nemesis “Dr. Cheese.” By today’s standards he had rather modest superpowers. He was shaped like a macaroni noodle and fought evil with his macaroni boomerang and macaroni nun chucks. Dr. Cheese on the other hand had more menacing powers, least of which was the ability to manipulate all cheese the way Magneto can manipulate metal. As a kid I projected who I wanted to be into Macaroni Man, he had adventures and did things that I wish I could do.

Our culture has a current fascination with super heroes, and I want to ask all of you, why you think that might be? Why do we love heroes? In case you’re wondering this isn’t a rhetorical question.

All of these reasons are true. As I was thinking about this question myself I kept coming back to the reason I love superheroes. I love them because they can do things that I could never do, and have power that is inaccessible to me. I could never fly, pick up cars, travel to different universes or defeat evil. Heck I could never even have enough money to afford Batman’s utility belt. Yet we still find ourselves drawn to them.

My favorite superhero is the Flash, the fastest being in the universe. I chose him as my favorite because he was something that I never was, fast. Even though I played soccer my entire life, I was often the slowest person on the field. I knew that no matter how hard I trained, or how often I ran I would never be as fast as he was. I idolized him because he was what I could never be. I watched his cartoons and dreamed of living like he did, yet still knowing it could never be for me.

I think that unfortunately sometimes when we read the gospels, we think of Jesus in a similar fashion. He is our hero, and when we read about his life sometimes we are tempted to think “I could never as Jesus lived.” I might be able to be like him, but he is Jesus, he did things that are impossible for us to do. We think that even though the Gospel tells us that Jesus was fully human, that he had a switch he could turn on in any instance. That at any point he could access his divinity, and live in a way that is inaccessible to us.

To illustrate what I’m talking about I’m going to show a clip from the Disney movie The Incredibles. If you haven’t seen the film I would encourage you to get it and watch it. It tells the story of a family of superheroes living in a time where superheroes are being sued for using their powers. The scene we’re going to watch comes from the very end of the movie, as the family goes to a track meet where Dash the middle child is competing. It just so happens that his superpower is super speed. Dennis go ahead and start the clip.

I love that scene, not only because it is humorous, but because who doesn’t wish secretly that they were a member of a family of superheroes? Yet I am also greatly challenged by that scene.

I think that sometimes when we read the gospels we think of Jesus like Dash at his track meet. That at any point in his life here on earth, he could turn it on and become the omnipotent all powerful son of God, leaving everyone in his dust. That as he healed the sick, raised the dead, and lived a life of intimacy with God because of his divinity. I have even found myself making jokes at times saying “of course he could do that, he’s Jesus.” I am going to contend this morning that Jesus couldn’t just switch it on, that he didn’t have a trap-door to heaven but rather that he was a human just like you and me. A human who needed his relationship with God the Father to sustain himself, and that when we talk about following Jesus, we mean being just like him.

This morning I want to challenge this notion, encouraging us that Jesus was like us in every way when he walked on earth. I want to encourage us to look at Jesus through the lens of Philippians 2:1-11.

Jesus viewed through the lens of Philippians 2:

This morning I want us to think of Jesus how he is described in Philippians 2:1-11, I’m going to be reading from the NIV:

2 Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, ² then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. ³ Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, ⁴ not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.

⁵ In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:

⁶ Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;
⁷ rather, he made himself nothing
by taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
⁸ And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
by becoming obedient to death—
even death on a cross!

⁹ Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name,
¹⁰ that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
¹¹ and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.

Jesus did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but rather put aside his equality with God the Father to come to earth and live as a human. Most heroes put on a suit which is meant to enhance their power. When Christ came on earth he put on the suit of humanity, he became less rather than greater. This morning I am contending that when Jesus came to earth, he put aside his divinity in order to take up the mantle of humanity. He did this because he knew that we need a savior that we could actually follow, not just a hero we could idolize.

The Rhythm of Jesus’ Life, the source of his power:

All heroes have a source of their power, Superman derives his from the sun’s rays, Green Lantern derives his from his own Green Lantern. Christ got the power for his ministry from the Rhythm in which he lived, moving from solitude-community-ministry.

When we read the Scriptures we see a distinct Rhythm to how Jesus lived his life. I am going to contend this morning that Jesus got the power for his ministry from this rhythm and through his dependence upon the Holy Spirit and his relationship with God the Father. In the Gospels we consistently see Jesus going from Solitude to Community to Ministry. It is the flow of his life. We see it over and over again in the Gospels. Jesus goes off on a mountain to pray, he spends time with his disciples, and then does ministry among the people.

I am going to contend this morning that the power of Jesus in his life of ministry came from this rhythm, and also that it is a rhythm that we are called to follow and it is a power to which we have access.

Luke 6:12-19:

¹² One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God.¹³ When morning came, he called his disciples to him and chose twelve of them, whom he also designated apostles: ¹⁴ Simon (whom he named Peter), his brother Andrew, James, John, Philip, Bartholomew,¹⁵ Matthew, Thomas, James son of Alphaeus, Simon who was called the Zealot, ¹⁶ Judas son of James, and Judas Iscariot, who became a traitor.

¹⁷ He went down with them and stood on a level place. A large crowd of his disciples was there and a great number of people from all over Judea, from Jerusalem, and from the coastal region around Tyre and Sidon,¹⁸ who had come to hear him and to be healed of their diseases. Those troubled by impure spirits were cured,¹⁹ and the people all tried to touch him, because power was coming from him and healing them all.

In this text we see a familiar story for us, the calling of Jesus’ twelve disciples. Yet as we read it I want you to be looking for that rhythm that I described earlier… In this text we see how Jesus went alone by himself to pray, in fact he spent all night praying about the decision he was going to be making. It is a decision about his community, the commissioning of the twelve apostles is the creation of the community that Jesus will spent his life in. They are essential, and we see here how Jesus moved from solitude in prayer into community. The text continues and shows us how Jesus moved from his community (the apostles) into ministry. Jesus did not simply call his community together for the sake of mission. He did so because he needed to be in vital community. This is how Jesus lived out his earthly life among us. It was this rhythm that gave him the power to do his ministry, it was not his innate divinity, but rather it was his complete dependence upon the Holy Spirit that gave him the power to do his ministry. When Jesus went up on the mountain to pray it wasn’t as if he was having a conversation with himself, he was pouring out his heart to God the Father. Jesus’ dependence upon the Holy Spirit gives us a very tangible model to follow. Jesus was able to heal the sick, raise the dead, and advance the Kingdom of God not just because he was Jesus, but because he allowed the Spirit to move freely through him. He knew that he needed a vibrant intimate relationship with God in order to do the work he had been called to. If he was dependent upon the Holy Spirit for the power of his ministry, we have access to the same power to do ministry as Jesus did. For we have been given the Holy Spirit as people of faith. The rhythm and model in which Jesus lived his life should be one that we ourselves follow. We can live as Jesus lived.

Conclusion, we can follow Jesus:

This morning we have encountered a very human, but powerful Jesus. We have seen that Jesus was like us in every way, understanding our struggles and temptations. The Jesus we have spoken about this morning is not just the heroic divine son of God, but also a powerful human leader who gave us the only example of how to live well. When we look at the life and earthly ministry of Jesus through the lens of Philippians 2, we see a Jesus who put aside his divinity to come to earth as a human being.

If I could leave you with one thing this morning it would be this. That you can live exactly as Jesus did, and that the power he experienced in his ministry is one you can experience as well. We cannot make excuses for ourselves saying things like “well that was Jesus” or “of course Jesus could do that.” For the power that Jesus had while on earth is accessible to us. If you want to know this power that Jesus accessed, go out and do the things that he did. Spend intentional time in prayer, seriously invest your time and effort in your Christian community and engage in real ministry. Serve the poor, help those who need you, and cry out for justice for the oppressed. Hang out with people you don’t usually hang out with. Get to know people at work, or people you encounter in your daily lives. Relax when someone cuts you off when you are driving. Be a person who speaks up for those who don’t have a voice. These are all very practical things that you can do that Jesus did, and you can do them with the same power he had. It was things like this that Jesus considered worth dying for. He was indeed the divine son of God who died for our sins, but he was also a radical human being who threatened the oppressive powers around him. A hero who didn’t have a trap door to heaven but rather  A human being who said to us “GREATER THINGS WILL YOU DO THAN THESE.” I wonder if when we read that we take Jesus seriously. Do you believe it, that Jesus meant what he said when he said this about us? Do we as a community of faith believe that we can live as Jesus lived? I want to be a person and part of a Christian community that answers that question with a resounding Amen, or Come On, or whatever you say when you’re excited. We can live a quality of life that is in line with Christ. We will never be perfect, but we can be like Jesus in every other way. Let us go into the world and live as Jesus did, and show the world the gospel through the actions of the people of God.

Message given by Jon Maroni at Spokane Friends Church, May 27, 2018

I volunteered, somewhat reluctantly, to serve on the Planning Committee for the 2018 Quaker Women’s Theology Conference at the end of the 2016 conference. Our first face-to-face meeting was in Seattle shortly after the election that gave us Donald Trump as president. At that time, all of us, regardless of our political perspective, were reeling from the lack of civility and the deep rancor of those times. As I clerked that meeting, I asked, “What does this conference mean to you and what are you hoping for in 2018?” The women gathered talked. I took notes. What we heard from one another was that the conference had provided a place of spiritual refuge. In those times it felt even more important to provide that place of spiritual refuge in light or our national political situation, and in light of the condition of Northwest Yearly Meeting’s deep schisms.

We chose the theme “Answering That of God in Every One” which is part of a longer famous George Fox quote. We chose that theme because to answer someone requires listening first. It implies that there is something of God in every person. How could we help each other do just that? We came up with the words “recognizing, imaging, naming, abiding.” Each word encompasses part of the process of “answering that of God in one another.”

Before we can recognize God in another, we need some experience of God in our own lives. We need some notion, image, or understanding of the Divine to look for in the other. We thought it might be helpful to explore names and images of God or Spirit together. I got excited about the many Old Testament names for God and the stories from which they emerge. I thought it could be helpful for both unprogrammed women that have far fewer words for God than Evangelicals who often have too many. The helpfulness would come from realizing that our names and images come from our own stories of the Divine Presence in our lives which is in keeping with the narrative theology the conference wishes to follow.

So, I embarked on a journey of studying the Old Testament names for God. I got to El Shaddai and found a treasure I did not expect. Controversy, confusion, weirdness, who could have known? Here’s what I discovered:

El Shaddai is most often translated in English versions of the Bible as God Almighty. The name Shaddai is used 41 or so times in the Old Testament, most often in the book of Job. However, when combined with El, in El Shaddai it is found only seven times exclusively in the story of the family of Abraham.

The etymology of the word is disputed among linguistic experts. The controversy revolves around which words are considered “root” words. The major opinions are Shaddai can be traced to:

shadad – a Hebrew verb meaning to destroy, overpower

sadu – an Akkadian noun meaning mountain or great strength

shad– a Hebrew word meaning breast

combined with ai – “my” my breast

combined with dai– pours out, heaps benefits – the God who is enough

So, what does El Shaddai reveal about God?  I can understand mountain and breast being related. Take for example the Grand Tetons, a mountain chain or the Rocky Mountains named by French fur traders viewing the jagged mountains protruding from the plains, the largest of which they called “le grande teton” (the big breast). But those two interpretations come from two different languages. God the destroyer, mountain or God the breast each carry significantly different implications.

So, it made sense to me to follow the story in which the name is revealed.

The first use of El Shaddai is in the story of Abraham when he is 99 years old. Almost 25 years earlier recorded in Genesis 12 Abram had received a leading from God to leave his hometown and move to a place God would show him as he traveled. God’s promise then was, “I will make you a great nation.” Exciting news since to this point Sarai, Abram’s wife, had been unable to conceive. When they arrived in Canaan the Lord appeared to Abram and said, “To your offspring I will give this land.” But there were no offspring. Life happened. About 10 years of life with significant marital and family discord. God repeats his promise in Genesis 15 to give Abram “a very great reward.” Abram’s reply reveals the couple’s struggle with childlessness. He says, “Sovereign Lord, what can You give me since I remain childless?” God responds, “One who will come forth from our own body will be your heir.” Time passes with no child. Sarai and Abram come up with a plan to have a child through Hagar, a servant. The plan is not without it’s disappointments and struggles once Ishmael is born. At 99 years old Abram, having had almost 25 years of disappointment, personal failures, marital strife, and other turmoil God comes again.

In Gensis 17 God says, “I am El Shaddai; walk before me faithfully and be blameless.  Then I will make my covenant between me and you and will greatly increase your numbers… As for me, this is my covenant with you: You will be the father of many nations.  No longer will you be called Abram; your name will be Abraham, for I have made you a father of many nations.  I will make you very fruitful; I will make nations of you, and kings will come from you… As for Sarai your wife, you are no longer to call her Sarai; her name will be Sarah.  I will bless her and will surely give you a son by her. I will bless her so that she will be the mother of nations; kings of peoples will come from her.” Abraham fell facedown; he laughed and said to himself, “Will a son be born to a man a hundred years old? Will Sarah bear a child at the age of ninety?” The answer to that question turned out to be, “YES”.

The name “El Shaddai” is used in Genesis 28 and 35 in the context of blessings of fruitfulness, and in Genesis 49 Jacob blesses Joseph and refers to Shaddai as the one

“who blesses you with blessings of the skies above, blessings of the deep springs below, blessings of the breast and womb.” There is no question in my mind that the correct interpretation of El Shaddai is related to breast. This name is an obviously feminine name for God. Breasts signify sustenance, sufficiency, intimacy.

Why the translation God Almighty? Dr. Eli Lizorkin-Eyzenberg, a scholar of ancient cultures and languages offers,

“The latter understanding of the name as Almighty, while allowing for the notion of all-sufficient supply stresses more the awesome power of God’s omnipotence and an objective more distant, or transcendent view of God. Perhaps this was driven in part by reluctance to view God in terms of subjective experience and closeness and also a reluctance to attribute to God feminine characteristics.”

Our names and images come out of our own experience of God with cultural and personal biases. I found the following commentary on El Shaddai by Witness Lee, a Chinese Christian author and Bible teacher, to be a great example:

“The title of God in Genesis 17:1, the all-sufficient God, in Hebrew… is el-Shaddai. El means the Strong One, the Mighty One, and Shaddai, implying the meaning of breast, udder, means all-sufficient. El-Shaddai is the Mighty One with an udder, the Mighty one who has the all-sufficient supply. An udder produces milk, and milk is the all-sufficient supply, having water, minerals and many vitamins in it and containing all that we need for our daily living. So, El-Shaddai means the all-sufficient Mighty One.

When Abraham did things by his natural self he forgot the source of his supply. In other words, he forgot God as his all-sufficient source of supply. Therefore, God came to Abraham and seemed to say, “I am the Mighty One with an udder. Are you hungry or thirsty? Come to this udder. The source of your supply is not your natural self, but I the Mighty One with an udder… I am the source. You are not the source. You should not live on your own or by yourself. You have to live by Me as the source of your supply.”

Maybe if you grew up on a farm the image of God an udder would be meaningful, but for me, breast is a much more powerful image. My family of origin was not particularly affectionate. I don’t have warm fuzzy memories of cuddling with my mom. I do have warm memories of nursing my own babies. There was tenderness, trust, complete dependence on my babies’ part and an unrestricted desire to provide on mine. That’s the picture of God here: tenderly holding us waiting to provide all that we need from her supply that does not run dry.

I have two points to this message today. The first is that in scripture there are lovely images of the Divine feminine. I believe El Shaddai is a clearly feminine name for God. My second point is that we are bound by our own experience of time, culture, language, etc. and develop images of God accordingly. The names and images of God that speak deeply to us arise from our own experience. We will all benefit by broader perspectives and different understandings as we listen to one another in the process of imaging and naming the Divine.

What name or image of God speaks to you today?

Message delivered by Leann Williams on Sunday, May 20, 2018 at Spokane Friends Church

You may recall several weeks ago when we first looked at the Old Testament record of Sarah’s life, we learned that the two most widely used terms for “God” in the old testament were not confined to one gender.  The word “Elohim” is a plural noun which includes both genders.  The other word of four Hebrew letters, Y,H,W,H, which is traditionally pronounced Yahweh, although no one knows how it should sound, since the ancient Hebrews were forbidden to say the name of the Holy One.  It is also a word without gender; in fact, it isn’t a name at all, it is the active form of the verb “to be”.  When Moses asked the Holy One what name he should use to tell his people who had spoken to him on the mountain, the answer was “I am that I am”.

And I hadn’t thought earlier about the creation story in Genesis.  In Chapter 1,the very first time God is named, the word  Elohim is used for the Holy One and in verse 26, we find “And Elohim said, “Let us make man in our image, in our likeness.”   So, from the very beginning Elohim is a plural Being.  Continuing on to verse 27 we find, “So Elohim created man in his own image . . male and female Elohim created them.”  It seems to be saying very clearly that both male and female are made in Elohim’s own image.  Interestingly, that’s the only thing we are told here about ourselves.  Elohim created us with gender and both kinds of humans are identified as being in the image of Elohim.

But, as we know, over the years, it was almost forgotten that the name Elohim has both masculine and feminine sides.  The Divine began to be thought of as singular and male. This image of Elohim is SO embedded in the minds of some people that they are shocked at any portrayal of Elohim with feminine characteristics. In most English translations of the Bible, this plurality is not carried through. However, it is there in the original Hebrew text.

The plurality of God is also seen in Genesis 3:22. After Adam and Eve sinned in the garden of Eden we find this fascinating conversation:

“Yahweh said, ‘Behold, the man has become like one of US, to know good and evil. Genesis 3:22 (NKJ).

Again in Genesis 11:7, Yahweh is discussing the solution to the whole earth having one language at the time of the Tower of Babel:

“Come, let US go down and there confuse their language, that they may not understand one another’s speech.” Genesis 11:7 (NKJ).

The fact that Yahweh uses “Us” in these passages is indeed another fascinating hint to the plurality of Yahweh.

Meanwhile, returning to the story of Sarah, we can perhaps summarize what the Bible tells us about her life as including the following events:

1. Sarai leaves her home to accompany her husband to the land of Canaan
2. First abduction of Sarai by Pharaoh when they go to Egypt for famine relief.
3. Sarai is barren, so she gives her Egyptian slave Hagar to her husband as a wife
4. Hagar runs away when pregnant because Sarai mistreats her, but Yah tells her to return.
5. Ishmael is born. Sarai laughs when she overhears the promise that she will bear a child
6. Sarai’s name (princess) is changed to Sarah (chieftainess)
7. Second abduction of Sarah by Abimelech, king of Gerar
8. Birth of Isaac when Sarah is 90 years old
9. Ejection of Hagar and Ishmael from their home over inheritance issues
10. Death of Sarah at age 127.

We know that Sarai was a beautiful woman – so beautiful that kings wanted her even when she was quite old according to our standards.  We also know many beautiful women become vain and proud of their looks and often difficult. But not Sarah.

It is clear from Scripture that she never let her beauty dictate or change her character. She obeyed her husband even to her detriment. Twice Abraham told Sarah to not let on that she was his wife but rather to say she was his sister. It wasn’t a lie, we know that they had the same father, but different mothers – and we also learned that since the mother determined the lineage, if their relationship was through the father, the marriage was not considered incestuous.  But even if it wasn’t a lie, it was certainly withholding relevant information.

Can you imagine the fear Sarai must have felt when she was basically stolen from her husband and taken to the king’s women’s quarters. It is clear that she loved her husband dearly, because she was willing to put herself in potential danger to protect him from possible harm.  Fortunately, Yah protected her and Abraham came in for severe criticism from the kings in both cases.

We know that Sarah is barren.  Sarai was barren (Genesis 11:30) so having Lot in the family provided her with the opportunity to be a sort of foster mother to Lot. However, for a woman not to be able to produce children on her own it was believed to be a sign that there was something in the woman’s life that was causing God not to bless her. This brought anguish, shame, and despair to Sarai.  The pain of childlessness in that society was crushing.

Sarah had an Egyptian slave-girl whose name was Hagar, and Sarah said to Abraham, “Since I have been prevented from bearing children; go to my slave Hagar. Maybe we shall obtain children by her.” And Abraham listened to the voice of Sarah. So Sarah, Abraham’s wife, took Hagar her Egyptian slave, and gave her to her husband Abraham as a wife.

Scripture says, “as a wife.” That is important. Not as a concubine. Hebrew has a perfectly good word for concubine but it is not used here. The word is the normal word for wife. Hagar is not just a temporary surrogate womb, but a wife. Ancient law permitted an arrangement for a slave to bear an heir for a childless wife, but it was not expected that a slave would become a wife alongside the first wife.

Writer C. Zavis suggests that Sarah made this offer out of respect for Hagar. Sarah knew what it meant to be simply a “sex object” from her experience in Egypt and, later, with King Abimelech. She was determined that this not happen to Hagar. So Sarah initiated a relationship of caring, of sisterhood. She treated Hagar no longer as a slave, but as an equal. In her generosity, Sarah pushed the boundaries of cultural norms.

This act of Sarah is amazing. It is amazing because it seems so close to the New Testament vision of the kingdom of the Infinite One where, as Paul says, there is neither slave nor free, Jew nor Gentile, male nor female, but all are as one. Maybe even Yah was impressed by this act of grace, because we read that the Spirit of Yah promised both Sarah and Hagar that their children would be founders of great nations. The Bible is the story of Yah’s dealings with Israel, but when we read what God promised to Hagar we are reminded that Yah has hopes and plans for other people as well. Hagar’s son would not be dismissed from Yah’s wider family.

However, when Hagar conceived, problems arose. Hierarchy does not disappear from our socially constructed order just because we take a step that direction. Sarah thought Hagar was becoming arrogant. Hagar perceived that Sarah was turning abusive. Finally Hagar fled, no longer feeling comfortable in that environment.

As Hagar wandered in the desert, broken and lonely, scripture says that “the angel of Yah found her.” I find much comfort in the fact that the first time in scripture that an angel of Yah appeared to someone, it was when they were wandering in a desert, broken and lonely.

The angel asked, “Where are you coming from? Where are you going?” Hagar replied, “I am running from my mistress, Sarah.” Calling Sarah her “mistress” is a sign that the dream of equality and sisterhood had crumbled.

Yet God told Hagar to return and not remain alienated from Sarah. Why? Here is a key to this way of reading the story. Hagar must harden her will and return precisely because unjust systems do not disappear from our socially constructed orders simply by taking one step. Maybe Yah wanted to give Hagar strength to stay engaged. God sent her back to talk with Sarah, and to try to live the relationship they both had hoped to create.

Living an alternative model in society, suggests Zavis, is hard work. It takes a strong and resilient heart. It takes persistence and a willingness to stand in the fire.

So Hagar returned. And for 14 more years she and Sarah continued working at this new social relationship. But, eventually it failed. Living the kingdom of Yah is hard when we bump up daily with the realities and limitations of society. The forces of culture, racism, patriarchy, hierarchy, and empire all wage war against the vision of the kingdom of Yah. Eventually Hagar and Sarah succumbed to despair.

Sarah failed her own high ideals most miserably. She would not be the first person to find that her generous impulses outran her ability to keep up. She went back to calling Hagar a slave and demanded that Abraham send away both Hagar and her son. The issue this time was inheritance. Sarah did not think the first born of the second wife should take precedence over the first born of the first wife.

Scripture says Abraham was distressed at Sarah’s request. It felt wrong to him. Yet Yah told him not to worry, but to listen, really listen to Sarah. At first reading of this story, I was surprised that Yah would side with Sarah.  I expected God to agree with Abraham.  But now that I am trying to think of Ya as inclusive of both genders, I am not as surprised.  Maybe Sarah, in making her initial generous gesture and living with it so long, had done all she could. No more needed to be asked of her.

Sarah is my sister. I, too, find life falls short of my highest ideals. I know what it is to have my good intentions run faster than my ability to keep up.  When I was baptized (that was before I became a Quaker)  I pledged myself to follow the way of Jesus. Even though there are times when I don’t have the strength to persevere, I believe in grace and I still think it is important to make the effort, to aim for the ideal, and to attempt the kingdom way.

Perhaps all efforts to live out the goals of Christ’s kingdom are temporary. Efforts to establish peace founder. Intentional communities fold. Schemes for correcting social wrongs end up creating new problems. Perhaps every attempt to live the kingdom way is not measured by whether or not it is permanent. Sarah’s effort to live as a sister to her former slave might not be judged as failure, but as an inspiring reach for the kingdom of Yah within our human relationships.  In fact, Ya also made her “a mother of nations,” and “kings of people” would come from her descendants, including King David and Jesus of Nazareth.

References:

1.  https://www.whatchristianswanttoknow.com/sarah-in-the-bible-character-profile-and-life-story/#ixzz5FLMxkk8V
2. Bob Bowman, professor of religion at Manchester University, Messenger, April 2017

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